Good News!

From today's readings: "All these things Jesus spoke to the crowds in parables. He spoke to them only in parables... "

The Gospel reading was from Matthew (Mt 13:31-35) and concerned the two parables, the mustard seed and the yeast as leaven. I got to thinking about the phrase, "He spoke to them only in parables..." Why only in parables? Of course, the reading says the reason was to fulfill the words of the prophet.

However, I would add another reason too. Just think, if someone came to you and gave you a new teaching that went way beyond what you were familiar with. A bit like Jesus speaking about the Kingdom and that He was the Savior who had been promised. Wouldn't you be a little hesitant about jumping on Jesus' bandwagon. Wouldn't you wonder if Jesus wasn't a little mentally challenged? You might even shake your head and turn away because such talk could get you into trouble. Your immediate response would probably be a NO!

BUT, if Jesus spoke in parables, I might be wondering what He meant. I might begin to think about some possibilities that I had not thought of before. It might come to me more clearly after I had an opportunity to turn these ideas over in my head. Maybe Jesus meant this... Maybe Jesus meant that... What did He mean? I might even go to Him privately and ask Him to explain it a little better. I might begin to see that what Jesus was saying wasn't impossible at all. And when I spoke to Him, I suddenly realized that He was not crazy either. That His words and actions were drawing me in. That He was someone I had been yearning for. That I wanted to be a follower, a believer... and a friend.

This conversion might not have taken place without the mental questioning that a parable evokes. So I am thankful that we have so many instances in the Gospels where Jesus does use parables to instruct us. That's Good News to me!

The Need for Silence Within

Although I am a pretty active person and have been involved in a lot of things for a long time, I am still basically a loner. I am not much of a conversationalist and I use up my "small talk" rather quickly when I am in a crowd. Mostly, I would rather the other person do the talking.

I think I am more of a listener... and the fact that people often come to me to tell me about sad things they are dealing with, bears this out. I think being able to listen is a gift that I received from God long ago. By living through my own experiences, I've been able to empathize with others. I don't doubt for a second, that God is working through me when my words bring comfort to others.

I like to be alone. Not necessarily physically alone, because I am very grateful to have one of my sons living with me. He also likes his own space; so we get along quite well. We are in the same house, but not always in each other's presence. We both like it that way.

But being alone doesn't always mean silence within. It is often difficult for me to meditate at home. Even when I go to my quiet place, I am surrounded by things that I need to do or that bring to mind other times. My thoughts scatter all around before I can tame them into even a semblance of that state where my God might speak to me. Those times when I do reach that silence within, I find it is a state I cannot maintain very long. Nonetheless, I am always grateful for every second...

I would like so much to live near a church that was open during the day. It would be such a treat to be able to open those doors and enter into that sanctuary of peacefulness where Our Lord resides. There, in the quiet of His house, I could much more easily hush the noisy conversations going on in my mind and truly experience the silence within where I could listen for the whisper of His word to me.

But one must do the best one can and so, I will make do with what I have and ask the Holy Spirit to quiet my mind and guide my prayer so that no matter where I am, I will be able to attain what I yearn for so much... that silence of His presence.

The Prayer of the Church

Many years ago, in fact in the latter part of the last century, I bought a copy of Christian Prayer, the single volume of The Liturgy of the Hours. I was in a diocesan program for ministry formation at the time; so the custom of praying this Prayer of the Church was brought to our attention and encouraged.

I found it very difficult to get into the rhythm of the Hours or to understand how to use the book correctly, so eventually I gave it up and put my Christian Prayer away.

During the last couple of months, however, my desire to try to learn this prayer has again come to the fore. From others on the Internet, I learned a little more about how the hours were prayed. I also learned that there was a website called Universalis on the Web, that provided the daily prayers of The Liturgy of the Hours free of charge. I have been using this site for the past couple weeks and I think I now understand much better how this prayer works.

Soooo, I took out my Christian Prayer book and took a second look... Well, the book was as much of a mystery as before. Flipping pages and trying to locate the correct prayers and trying to figure out where to put the ribbons was going to be my downfall again! UNTIL I learned that one simply needed to buy a Christian Prayer guide for a couple dollars and the puzzle would be solved!

I now have the guide. And, I am learning how to make some sense of how everything is integrated in the prayer book. I will also continue to use the Universalis but when I wish to be truly alone in my prayer, I will be able to use the book wherever I might be...

For those of you who have thought of praying the Liturgy of the Hours but have felt it was too daunting a task to learn, have patience with yourself. Look how long it took me! The Holy Spirit surely must have pushed me to try one more time. I must not have been ready the first time; but I hope I am now...

Burdens we place on ourselves...

This morning at Mass, the priest spoke about what God has asked of us. God's only command is that we love Him with our whole being and to love those we come in contact with. It is this simple.

However, because of the baggage we bring with us from past relationships and situations, we are burdened down with much more than is required of us... Loving God and our neighbor becomes entangled with so much of our baggage, that we no longer see clearly God's simple command.

I was really struck by the reality of these words by the priest as they related to my own life. These past several days, I had been sorely troubled about several things. As I listened, it dawned on me that I was burdening myself needlessly. As soon as I realized this, the troubles fell away...

It is always amazing to me how the Holy Spirit works through others and often, in such unexpected ways.

A Date to Remember...

Forty-two years ago today, one of my children died. It wasn't unexpected. Bobby had been diagnosed with acute lymphocytic leukemia in the Fall of 1964 at the age of three. He had actually survived longer than the average child with this disease. In those days, leukemia was a death sentence.

We had five sons and Bobby was the middle child. He endured a lot; as did we all. He was a great kid! Full of life... never let the disease get him down... until he had nothing left to give.

My family survived this loss. As those who have experienced the loss of a child know, it isn't easy. Many marriages break up after such a traumatic experience. People grieve in different ways...

We had four other sons to cherish and care for; and to try to reassure that they would not live in fear that a similar thing might happen to them. Actually, not long afterwards, one of my sons developed symptoms that frightened him. I had to take him to our doctor who kindly spoke with him and told him directly, that he had no cancer. I'm sure that throughout their childhood, this fear lurked.

Forty-two years is a lifetime for some people. A lot has happened to our family since that morning of July 15, 1967; but people often grow stronger when faced with adversity. And God took care of us...

That morning in the hospital, a doctor came into the room with a gift for me. He realized that my child would probably not live much longer. He also knew that it was my birthday...

All of my help... Psalm 121

One of the most beautiful of the Gospel songs that my choir sings is called, "All of my help" made famous by the Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir. Here is the link to it:

All of My Help

If you take time to listen to the song, please recognize that my choir does not have an orchestra behind us and all the fancy stuff that goes into an album or video. We also have to shorten the song in order to make it an appropriate length for Mass.

However, when we sing this song, we sing it just as beautifully. It is actually Psalm 121 and it is truly a prayer. Our words go like this:

I will lift up mine eyes to the hills
From whence cometh my help...
My help cometh from the Lord;
The Lord which made heaven and earth.

He said, He would not suffer thy foot,
Thy foot to be moved...

The Lord that keepeth me,
He shall not slumber nor sleep.

Oh, the Lord is thy keeper...
The Lord is thy shade,
Upon thy right hand...
Upon thy right hand...

No, the sun shall not smite thee by day,
Nor the moon by night,
He shall preserve thy soul
Even forever more.

My help, my help, my help...
All of my help
Cometh from the Lord.


There is a little more to it but this is the basic song. I just love it and believe me, when we sing it, it is a prayer...

Light to see by...

On Wednesday evenings, I am the one who turns out the lights and locks up the church after our choir has finished rehearsing for Sunday's Liturgy.

As the last light is extinguished, I am left temporarily blinded by the total darkness. Before my eyes adjust to the darkness, I must find my way to the final sanctuary step without tripping.

For about ten seconds, I can see nothing. But one of my friends is always near that hazardous step, lighting the way with her cell phone's glow so I won't fall. She realizes that the step cannot be seen from my direction.

This weekly ritual of being in darkness and then seeing light and following it, reminds me of how God often works in our lives.

How many times have we walked in the darkness and confusion that is sin, trying to feel our way, find our way, out of the turmoil it has caused us. God's light of forgiveness dawns in our souls and His grace allows us to take another step toward Him.

"Lord, give us light to see by..."

Not what I expected...

Today I had an appointment with my SD. I left my shop an hour early because it takes me about 40 minutes to reach my destination. As usual I was looking forward to seeing him and I had some things to talk about.

So I walked in and sat in my usual chair in the lobby to wait. I never know what the traffic is going to be like so I always plan for about 15 minutes leeway. Well, the clock struck three and there I sat. After about 10 more minutes, I decided to call his cell phone... such a long wait was very unusual. No answer... Finally I saw several people come along and I asked where Fr. J. was.

Someone paged him... no response. Someone called him on his cell phone... again, no response. They finally determined that he was not in the building.

Okay, so I asked if I could sit in the chapel for awhile... Of course, someone said...

So, I spent the rest of my hour there... and it was really a godsend because I rarely am able to sit and listen to what God might want to say to me. It was very peaceful and quiet in the chapel. It is not easy to do this at home... Even if I am in a quiet place at home, my thoughts seem to connect with things I have to do there. I become easily distracted...

But today in that chapel, I could be at peace.

Up in the air about something!

I was reading Fr. Charles' interesting entry about dreams on his blog, a friar minor, today. It made me start thinking about dreams that I have had.

By the way, Fr. Charles' blog is the very best blog I have read after many excursions through the realms of Catholic blogdom. I never come away from reading his entries without a new insight into priestly life and a better understanding of how our God works through His people to bring us closer to Him. Yes, this is definitely a recommendation to visit a friar minor!

Anyway, back to dreaming... Like most people I dream in color. I have sometimes become aware during a dream that I am dreaming. That I should be able to influence what happens. And that I should be able to direct what happens next. Since I don't write down my dreams (though I did a few times long ago), I can no longer tell you where I took those particular dreams, if anywhere.

One of the more interesting dreams I had occurred during the time my mother-in-law was living with us. She was with us for thirty years and was tremendously helpful to us when my children were growing up. I had a good relationship with her until the end of her life, when her mental and physical health deteriorated. She lived into her nineties. She survived my husband by just over a month.

The dream sequence began when I realized I was in the hallway of my home. I was up in the air for some reason! And what an interesting sensation that was... to be floating around above the floor and almost to the ceiling! It took awhile to get my bearings and to figure out how to move in that position (fly?).

Well, I managed to float my way down to the living room where I noticed my mother-in-law rearranging the curtains on my big picture window. Whatever she was doing was exactly what I didn't want her to do with my curtains! I called out to her to please leave the curtains as I had them. She completely ignored me and went on doing what she was doing. I asked her again to leave the curtains alone. Then I realized that she couldn't hear me! She was in my dream but she couldn't hear me speaking. That actually was weird!

I must have awakened right after that realization, because there was nothing further to recall about the dream.

One wonders how significant our dreams are, especially when one recalls the dreams found in Holy Scriptures. Momentous happenings predicted; instructions given... one of God's ways of communicating with us.